These 3 Steps Get Rid Of Your Shyness Around Woman
It’s one thing to attract a woman, and another to make her fall her HARD for you even though you’re not “her type”. When a particular babe initially doesn’t think much of you, changing her mind is a pleasant turn of events for both of you.
Sure, it takes some serious skills to put a woman into a “can’t-stop-thinking-about-you” frame of mind. But it’s even more kick-ass when she couldn’t even see you in a romantic light, to begin with.
One moment you’re slipping past her radar then her head’s spinning the next. This gradual, unexpected kind attraction is a very welcome surprise to women.
The reason why I’m talking about this phenomenon is because of most of the time, you hear guys in the seduction community bragging about getting girls in bed within the first several hours of meeting her.
There are gurus out there whose school of inner game is focused on “sealing the deal” in the shortest possible time. That works for them, and I’m not about to burst anyone’s bubble over that.
But then again, this flavor of pick-up isn’t everyone’s bag. There are men who have time to spare and don’t need to project overflowing amounts of attraction right from the get-go.
Sometimes, it’s a breath of fresh air to take a woman along a guided tour as she slowly discovers all the wonderful things about you without some deadline in your brain.
Here’s the deal: most men are already smart, funny, creative and attractive guys. The problem is that NOT ALL of these dudes can present themselves in a way that makes their qualities VISIBLE to women.
Imagine if you found it easy to talk to women in such a way that sexual tension and chemistry gets built up between the two of you? Go watch this short video, it’s packed with amazing tips on how the female mind works, and how to talk to women:
It’s sadly a frequent trend to see men’s great personalities being held back by SHYNESS. See, it’s not enough to be an awesome guy, people need to SEE IT as well.
Think of yourself as a one-man advertising firm – there are certain things you can do to naturally play up the best part of yourself without acting like someone else. With that, let’s go over some of the best ways to cure yourself of your bashfulness.
#1: Approach People More
Learn how to talk to people first. Note that I’m not even talking about women per se. If you come across beautiful women and find yourself freezing up, why not start off being more sociable in general first?
I mean, you can’t talk to women if you’re afraid of interacting with the rest of humanity. It’s not like you can be a totally charming guy around hot chicks and cut yourself off from society at the same time, right?
So: get off your lazy butt and make an effort to be more chatty with the folks you run into every day. Whether it’s the guy who delivers your take-out Chinese dinners or the cashier at the bookstore, seize the opportunity to lose your fear of approaching.
It’s like lifting weights – you can strengthen your social muscles by starting off nice and easy with basic, everyday interactions with people you don’t need to hit on.
DON’T be such in a hurry to transform yourself into a stud overnight. Once you’re immune to the fear of talking to others, you can graduate to the next level.
For the meantime, don’t pass up the chance to be a friendly, responsive fellow when someone starts talking to you. While you’re at it, take the initiative and start a conversation yourself.
The benefits outweigh the risks – the worst that could happen is that they’ll shrug you off while you go on with your life. Oh, the horror! But really, your detachment of the outcome coupled with a genuine enjoyment of other people’s company is exactly the kind of attitude that attracts women.
You’ll have to be cheerful, upbeat, and relaxed – whether you’re talking to a hot chick or your favorite hot dog vendor.
#2: Dress Better, Groom Better
The plain truth is that you need to be considerate enough to have a respectable amount of hygiene and a reasonable sense of style. I’m not asking you to be vain or spend all day working on your looks.
It’s simply a matter of keeping yourself tidy and presentable. Even if you weren’t interested in meeting women, you still need to be up to scratch on BASIC stuff like this.
If you can’t even function as a member of society because you look like you crawled out of a dumpster (or smell like one for that matter), you wouldn’t get very far with women in particular.
So the only option you’re left with is to be savvy to a point where people (women included) can take you seriously as an adult. That’s it – nothing more, nothing less.
If you need help updating your style, get a friend to embark on a MODEST makeover by going through your clothes.
Your companion should be brave enough to give you a straightforward and truthful analysis of your current fashion sense and suggest what changes need to be made.
Check out men’s magazines and see which set of threads would best suit you. Remember, you don’t need to look like a model, but you do need to be well-put together.
Make “practical-yet-visually-appealing” your rule of thumb. Put down some of your hard-earned money on a few high-end items (like shirts, belts, and shoes) to give the rest of your average ensemble a nice polish.
That way, you don’t have to break the bank just to look good. When you visit those clothing stores, make sure to be good friends with the staff because they too will provide you with much-needed guidance on which clothes best suit your specific frame.
As for grooming, it’s a pretty rudimentary matter but I’ll walk you through it anyway. Don’t neglect the daily need for showers, putting on deodorant, brushing your teeth, shaving wayward stubble, and so on.
Being clean isn’t really a complicated matter, but some guys don’t realize the impact this has on their dating lives and SKIP this essential maintenance.
It’s a basic courtesy to be religious about these things. Like I said earlier, it does not about look itself, but rather giving people the impression that you TAKE CARE of yourself. Think about it from a woman’s point of view.
The reason why she bothered with all that grooming and hygiene jazz is because she knows that no guy would approach her otherwise.
Of course, I’m not asking you to be perfect, but merely to show everyone that you make the EFFORT to look the best you can. If you can create this perception in others, you will have gotten your proverbial foot in the door.
If you have any issues related to dental, dermatological or other related matters, it isn’t an excuse. Concerns like these are a specialist’s appointment away. Obviously, you’re gonna have to pay them but it’s a worthwhile investment for your long-term attractiveness.
The means to improve yourself are all there, but it’s really up to you if you’d like to use them or not.
#3: Learn To Be A Better Conversationalist
Going to back to our first point, I said that you have to loosen up by talking to complete strangers. While that’s the best training in shyness reduction, you’ll need the skills to hold a nice, pleasant conversation as well. You wouldn’t go out into the fray without any background in basic chatting, would you?
So pay attention to a couple of key techniques to get the conversation going. First of all, be a GOOD LISTENER. Nothing pleases someone more than knowing that the person they’re talking to actually cares about their opinion or what he/she has to say.
It’s just good manners to pay attention to their end of the conversation. Furthermore, showing interest generates good vibes all around because you’re focused on them, which is highly attractive.
But that’s not all – your attentive ear will tip you off on which questions to ask them. Expressing interest is best manifested when you ask them related things about what others have just told you.
As for the questions themselves, keep them light and evenly paced. You don’t want to turn someone off from peppering them too much with a barrage of queries.
The important thing is that you can show you’re interested in lending a REAL ear and wanting to know more about the other person’s stories in the form of questions.
Remember: once you’ve learned to master the three important habits we’ve just covered today, you’ll find that you’re more confident than before. This is the most NATURAL way of losing your shyness.
If mingling with others doesn’t bother you, why would you be afraid of walking up to someone you are attracted to? If you’re clean, presentable and sociable enough, you’d have no reason to be afraid of talking to strangers.
So make sure to get started with the stuff we’ve talked about here. After you’re cured of your shyness, you can go out there and approach women much more easily.
Do you want to know the biggest secret women are hiding about what turns them on? Go watch this video from my friend Anna right away. The video is packed with killer material. You’ll find out exactly how to be the kind of guy she fantastizes about.
Now it’s YOUR turn!